By Ruth Hirsch

Published in the Jewish Press: August 26, 2011,

Naomi was outwardly happy, active in her community and her children’s schools, and working part-time in a satisfying job when she came to see me. “I’d really like to get in shape, but just don’t seem to be able to stay on a diet, or get the exercise I know I need.”

Conventional wisdom would advise her to use willpower to “just stick to a diet.” Unfortunately, as most of us know, willpower alone simply won’t help us to accomplish many of the things that we’d like to in our lives. Despite knowing what might be “good” for us, it is as if there is another part inside that has other ideas.

In Focusing we find that by turning our attention to these other places, by showing them respectful curiosity and even compassion, they open up and share with us what is going on for them that has made them say no to what another part wants.

For Naomi, by listening to the parts of herself that did not want to go on a diet, she learned that they were scared of what losing weight might mean for her. So, it wasn’t that they didn’t want to diet per se, but that in their own way they felt that they were protecting her.

Once Naomi was able to hear this, to be curious about what this part was really scared might happen, to really take this in, and to show compassion to this place, staying on a diet became relatively easy for her.

In everyday living, we normally move so quickly that we are aware of only surface layers of our lives, the people, events, and such that are right in front of us. There is so much more that is important, that affects us in many ways, but we’re not consciously aware of. When we slow down a bit, we might have the sense of a vague feeling, perhaps sadness, anxiety, or a not so subtle feeling that something is missing, or even a wanting for something in our lives to be different. We usually brush these feelings away, determined to move forward, to not be sidelined by something that feels peripheral, or worse, that threatens to upset the balance of our already full lives.

We are all blessed with far more wisdom than we can access through our conscious minds. Focusing is a body-oriented process we can use to access deeper levels of knowing not readily accessible through our conscious minds that involves a unique way of paying attention and listening to oneself and to others; It involves shifting attention from the level of conscious understanding to the vaguer edge of thinking/feeling/sensing.

The process of Focusing allows us to “see” and “hear” at increasingly deeper and subtler levels within. We learn how to “listen” to our hearts, to our souls, to our inner depths. Focusing promotes the deepening of understanding of oneself and others, and thereby facilitates insight, healing and growth. The process may be done alone, with a partner, or with a professional such as a therapist, body worker, spiritual leader, or guide.

Focusing was developed by Eugene Gendlin, PhD, based on research into the question, “What leads to successful outcomes in psychotherapy?” Gendlin found that clients who connected with a vague edge of awareness progressed more rapidly in therapy. He developed the process of Focusing to allow others who do not do this naturally to be able to shift their attention in this way.

What does Focusing offer us that is different from other inner awareness processes? Focusing differs in three important ways from many other techniques that involve listening within in that it is:

• grounded in the body;
• a practical, specific process that may easily be learned. Essential aspects of the process include the important steps of acknowledging, accepting, and caring about whatever is present; and
• inherently a tremendously empowering process in that it involves “looking” directly at our inner experience. This differs from the general approach of western and nearly all alternative approaches to healing of trying to get rid of what is perceived as uncomfortable or otherwise unwanted feelings or physical sensations.

How does Focusing differ from mindfulness meditation? The goal of mindfulness meditation is to notice what is present in one’s consciousness, but not to engage with it in any other way. Just to notice. The process of Focusing takes mindfulness meditation several steps further to actually acknowledge, and then to be curious about and compassionate to all that we notice. The goal is to cultivate a positive inner relationship. That is, whereas the meditator’s goal is simply to observe what is present in the inner space, the Focuser engages in compassionate curiosity and active listening to whatever is present.

What results can you expect from Focusing? A few examples of some of the many benefits include:

• Improved relationships;
• Inner peace;
• Clarity and ease in making decisions;
• Improved attention; and
• Enhanced spiritual growth and understanding.

Focusing “expands” our experience to allow us to feel more whole. Many people have a dominant mode of experience. That is, our worlds are primarily experienced on the intellectual, emotional, physical, or spiritual dimension. The process of Focusing enables us to experience reality in a more integrated way, which creates a more holistic, multi-dimensional experience.

Focusing enables us to make peace with who we really are. So often we think of ourselves in one way, but our bodies or emotions or spirit (or all three!) seem to be drawn in different directions. Focusing is a process that helps us come to a sense of ourselves that is more integrated.

The essence of Focusing is to be present in a compassionate and spacious way with what is true in the body/mind/spirit at a given time. While the Focusing process does involve specific steps, most important is not so much the structure of the process. Rather, maintaining an attitude of kindness, curiosity, patience, spaciousness, and general acceptance with whatever is in us that wants to have our attention, to be “birthed,” is most important.

Focusing is a profound approach to honoring and understanding aspects of inner experience that are often hidden from conscious awareness. Although developed as a mind/body practice, Focusing offers a way to inform and enhance our spiritual lives as well.

Suggestions for further reading:

Web Resources

The International Focusing Institute website:  http://www.focusing.org/

The author’s website: http://www.ruthhirsch.com

Books & Manuals

Cornell, Ann Weiser (1996).  The Power of Focusing: A Practical Guide to Emotional Self-Healing. California: New Harbinger Publications.

Gendlin, Eugene T (1986) Let Your Body Interpret Your Dreams. Illinois:  Chiron Publications.

Gendlin, Eugene T (1981). Focusing. Second Edition. New York:  Bantam Books.

Hirsch, Ruth G. (2010). Focusing Training Manual: Level One & Two. Second Edition..

Bio

Ruth Hirsch, MSW, MPH is a certified Focusing trainer and psychotherapist based in Jerusalem. In private practice since 1990, she offers individual sessions and group training both in-person and via teleconference.

Contact Information

ruth@ruthhirsch.com

510.868.0885 (U.S. number)

054.749.2509 (Israel)

Some quotes related to this article:

One must not search outside nature but within oneself, where the keys to harmony and happiness lie.
– Marc Chagall

To he what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming,is the only end in life.
– Robert Louis Stevenson
Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside dreams. Who looks inside awakens.
– Carl Jung
Try a small taste of Focusing for yourself

1. Sit comfortably in a place where you will not be disturbed for at least 5-10 minutes.

2. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, and as you exhale imagine that you can exhale out the day so far. As though with each exhalation you can gently imagine that there is more room inside just for you.

3. Gently allow your awareness to shift to the inside, to the area of your body that includes your throat, your chest, your abdominal area.

4. Ask inside, how am I in here right now? Then take your time to just notice what comes, whatever it might be.

5. Acknowledge what comes, maybe even saying hello to it, whatever it is.

6. Just notice how it is to say hello to yourself in a friendly, compassionate way, as if you were meeting one of your dearest friends.

7. Now notice if it would be ok to thank your insides for sharing with you, and then gently bring your awareness back to your breath, and the room that you’re sitting in. Give yourself a nice stretch, and gently open your eyes.